Babies
Monday, July 20th, 2009Dear Frannie,
How are babies made?
Hadley in NH
Dear Hadley,
I’m not sure how they were made in your house, but in mine all it took was a 6-pack and poor planning.
Love, Frannie
Archive for the ‘kids’ Category
Feeding Johnny
Tuesday, June 9th, 2009Dear Frannie,
My 10 year old son, “Johnny,” won’t eat anything. He has whittled the food he will actually eat down to elbow pasta with butter, white bread, American Cheese and chocolate milk. I’m getting worried. When we go to a friend or relative’s house he hardly touches anything and acts lethargic and silent. What should I do and what should I feed him?
Alice in Kentucky
Dear Alice,
I’ve never met a lethargic quiet child I didn’t like. Feed him elbow pasta with butter, white bread, American Cheese and chocolate milk.
Truly, Frannie
Here’s Looking at You, Kid
Monday, June 8th, 2009Dear Frannie:
My two boys are 6 and 7 years old. Last night, my husband was glued to one of those raunchy half-naked reality shows on MTV. My sons walked into the room and were instantly entranced. Just as these two well endowed bimbos were peeling off their tube tops and short-shorts for a day at the nude beach I asked my husband if he thought this was an appropriate show for the boys. Much to their dismay, he switched the channel. They started laughing to each other and my younger son turned to the older one and said, “Dude, she was looking right at me!” Is this normal behavior for a Kindergardener?
Concerned, Near Canada
Dear Near Canada,
I think any year old boy who thinks a nude girl on MTV is staring at him has a healthy ego and decent taste in women. To make nudity less of a novelty you and your husband should do everyday chores naked, just watch out for flying debris when you mow the lawn.
Best, Frannie
